So, I've been thinking. Sometimes that happens. And when it does random topics whirl through my mind like mini cyclones, and sometimes in order to make sense of these thoughts I will write them down. In the chaos and the tumult that is my mind, the ability to stop time by capturing those thoughts and depositing them on a page is invaluable to me, and so, here we are.
The word "love" gets thrown around so much on a day-to-day basis, it's a wonder the letters haven't broken off and gotten lost forever. Or--have they? How often do you say you "love" something as silly as a pair of shoes or an ice cream flavor?
I have many favorite novels and one of those is The Secret Life of Bees. It was remade into a movie with Queen Latifah. Meh. Anyway, set in the 60's at the start of the Civil Rights Movement, there is this matriarchal character in the story named August (think of the vocab word). She is one of the so-named Calendar sisters in the book (the others are named May and June and there was once an April). August takes in a 14-year old runaway, the main character in the story, and her name is Lily. Like most storylines of the ilk, August is wise and weary and capable of great one-liners. And this is one of them:
On page 140, August tells Lily,"We are so limited, you have to use the same word for loving Rosaleen as you do for loving Coke with peanuts. Isn't that a shame we don't have more ways to say it?"
The first time I read that line (Summer of 2005) I pondered it for hours afterward, desperate to find another word to replace the one that should remain sacred. And came up with....exactly nothing. It has never been far from my thoughts since then.
So, your challenge for this week, poppets, is to dig deep inside yourself and think about what it is that you really love. In order to do that, I think it would be beneficial to start out with a working definition of what love is. How would you define it? What characteristics would be a good representation of it? And then, at long last, ask yourself..."What do I love?"
Does putting a classification on things you have previously said you "loved" change your perspective on what the meaning of love should be?
Oh, and for those of you wondering, "what's with the title of this blog, Bunj"--the Eskimo language has 32 words for denotative love. 32?!!!!!
My definition of love is that you love something no matter what happens, and that you get happy and forget all your problems when you are with that thing or person that you love. If you are having a bad day and then you see an episode of The Office come on and your bad day gets put behind you, your troubles go away, and you are happy, then you actually love The Office. If The Office has a few bad episodes and one really bad one and it still makes you happy and in a good mood, then you love The Office. Now if you replace The Office with other things that you think you love in what I previously just said, you can find out if you love it. The things I actually love, (besides my family, friends and girlfriend because I obviously love them), include Sakura, molten lava cake at Chile’s, soccer, the 2:30 bell, school lunches with my girlfriend. I actually love those things because they make everything better, make me forget my problems, and make me really happy, no matter what they do.
ReplyDeleteI think the word love is thrown around too easily. I 100% agree with the quote because although we do love a type of food as well as our loved ones, it isn’t really the same or comparable. So this classification of things that I’ve said I’ve loved before completely changes my perspective on what love really is. Real love should almost always be unconditional; you love something if, no matter what, you put it above all else because you hold it closest to your heart. Seeing or feeling love strikes emotion in your heart and brain like nothing else because it’s special and unique. I love my girlfriend because I look forward to seeing and talking to her everyday which is different from anything else in my life. Therefore, she’s special to me so I love her.
ReplyDeleteLove is a tough word to compare to others or find a substitute for. The word love can be used for any affection towards something or someone. The word love is stronger than like and is more used than like. The synonyms for love are fondness, endearment, passion, or attachment. I don't see those as synonyms of love but I do see them as feelings received from love. I agree with the line from "The Secret Life of Bees." Why doesn't the English language have more common words for love? Maybe using the four letter word is easier to say or that we don't have such a word that compares to love. For an example, cherish is a word for treasuring and enjoying something. It's unalike to love that is used for simply liking and appreciating. The word love has been overused and meant for something or someone incomparable to each other in importance like loving my favorite drink or loving my sister. They are of different importance and fulfillment levels.
ReplyDeleteTo me, love is something that fills your life with a joy, that’s different from everything else. A good representation of love is when someone or something makes your day better, whether it’s making you smile or putting you in a good mood. This doesn’t have to be a family member or a friend, you can love something as simple as a piece of food. But, expressing how you love a person shouldn’t be expressed the same as loving a piece of food. This is why I agree with the quote from The Secret Life of Bees. As much as I love food, I don’t love it the same was as I love my friends and family. I love my friends and family in a way that, I would drop everything for them. Looking back at all of the different things that I’ve said I loved, this does change my perspective on the meaning of love.
ReplyDeleteWell jeez bunje!! These blogs always get me re-evaluating all of my life choices. The topic of love is always complicated for me. I genuinely don't even know if I really know what love is. I mean yes I do walk around all day saying I love you about inanimate objects, just things, how can you really love a possession? Well for starters I know that I have this unconditional love for animals, specifically dogs, they are just the purest most happy creatures to be alive and UGHHH!!! But when I comes to people my guard for love goes up. I like to say that I have an appreciation for people, definitely not a love for all, but for sure an appreciation. In all honesty love is a truly tricky thing. Its burned in our minds by society to love our parents and family, but do we truly love them? I can easily answer that with a no. There are many people in my family that I don't feel love for. That may sound cruel but it's the truth. There is only so much love you can give another person without receiving it back until you realize that its one sided and lose the feeling. That's how relationships work, you give a little to the person and they give a little back. If the relationship becomes one sided the person will lose feeling and end it. That's just how all relationships work. So to answer the question what do I love id answer by telling you I love my friends. I know I bring them into every blog but they are truly the strongest and just most amazing people I have ever met. I absolutely adore kaela, not to single her out but i've known her for soooo long and have watched her grow and flourish into the beautiful person she is today. I truly do love and admire the person she is and wish she’d see all the wonderful things I see. Same thing goes for Gabbie, ugh she is my person for everything. Honestly my soulmate, she is such a strong individual and I truly love her with all of my heart. I have a new found love for forgiveness, I cant believe im even saying this but it's true. I choose who I want to forgive, which probably defeats the purpose in forgiving in the first place but its baby steps. For now I have chosen to forgive someone who was once a very big part of my life and now that they are back in it I honestly couldn't be happier. To even begin to forgive you have to accept all that comes with that forgiveness. For now I can say that I truly love forgiveness and where it's gotten me at the moment. As I get older I feel like i gain a little more wisdom about love and how it operates, because after all everything to do with life is trial and error.
ReplyDeleteWtf I’m 17 I never even have been in love. But ight. Digging deep into my little brain library, I can recall ideas, perspectives, and sights of what “love” is. I’d say a good 71% of my recollection of love is gathered from movies and shows. Books. Friends and family. Then a plethora of other things I’ve seen in my life. Now the 29% of what I think love is, is from past experience in my own life. I’ve cried very hard and have been so happy all because of one boy who I would love to smack across the face today. Isn’t that weird. Love is so freaking weird.. I’m 17 and I allowed my emotions to be determined by how this boy made me feel. A BOY.. WHILE IM STILL A YOUNG GIRL. Like idk shit just amazes me. Yet I can’t come to blame myself or feel a sense of regret for acting ways I did, because I think it’s just what happens when you think you love someone. You will act dumb, you will let a person be the reason you are crying, you will let a person determine if you are happy. My point is love actually does cause you to do silly things and I think it will always remain a mystery. Maybe until the day I fall in love that is.. IF I FALL IN LOVE... anyway, I still feel like I don’t have enough knowledge or at least experience from myself to judge or even define what love is... I have an idea of love but then again love seems unpredictable. I agree with the quote, “We are so limited, you have to use the same word for loving Rosaleen as you do for loving Coke with peanuts. Isn't that a shame we don't have more ways to say it?" I do feel as though love is a word that is thrown around a lot for the simplest things in life we enjoy but we still use that term for the most meaningful moments in our lives.. I think what gives that word meaning is when it’s said and how it’s said. The context around the word, the tone, and the message being portrayed. So to list some of the things I love, truly love, - Kaela. My person. She is my absolute best friend. I thought I had a best friend before knowing her, but after meeting Kaela we instantly clicked. We share a bond that is so close and so real.. I don’t think I will ever find that bond in another person. We bring the best out in each other. After reading this blog for the first time I instantaneously called her and told her that we can’t say I love you anymore, so we decided on saying “you’re my person”. -My mom. Everybody loves their mama right? My mom is something incredible. I don’t think any amount of words can become close to portray the amount of love I have for her. She’s my queennnnnnn!!! -the life I’ve been blessed with. Everything in my life, good and bad. It has made me into the person I’ve become and the person I’m growing into. I do love my life even at bad times. I recognize the privilege I have. I will always be thankful for what life has brought me & what it will bring me. - I also love the shit out of my dog. I’ll save that for my op. ;)
ReplyDeleteAlright Ms. Bunje, challenge excepted.
ReplyDelete"An intense feeling of deep affection" is the google definition of love. But I believe that love is more then that and in its totality it is more then what can be expressed with pen and paper or in this case a comments section on an online written blog website. But to expand on google's definition, to love means that want to spend the rest of your life with that person or doing that activity or eating that food. You don't always have to like what you love if it's a person you can argue with them but if you truly love them then the argument will fade into a distant memory in which you got passed your differences. Some characteristics of love include spending everyday you can with whatever it is you love. Always getting through hard times together, and having each others backs no matter what(if its a person). You can love many things and not everything I love is human or even sentient, some things aren't even tangible. Some people I love are my mother and father along with my brother and every other close family member. I also love my gf. Some non human entities I love are my dogs, they're like my best friends sometimes. I also love the outdoors and activities that are involved in being outdoors. For example lacrosse(view student expert presis), snowboarding(and others in op paper), and I love hunting and fishing along with time shared with others doing those things. And finally though some may disagree with me and I respect their opinions, I love this country.
My definition of love is when you hold someone/thing dear and it brings positivity into your life. Some characteristics include the typical joy and undeniable feeling of comfort. In this day and age however, the word “love” is definitely thrown around carelessly sometimes. There are so many things that we enjoy so we slap the word “love” onto it. I, and many others, are guilty of using it without actually meaning anything. I agree with the quote from The Secret Life of Bees. My love for a wonderful book is not the same as the love I have for my pets. The love I have for my pets isn’t the same as what I hold for my parents. Overall, this absolutely changed my perspective on the meaning of love.
ReplyDeleteI 100% agree that the four-letter word "love" has gotten thrown around and used so many times that it's most likely tired of being used for such stupid things. I'm not gonna lie and say I don't say I love things all the time when I'm being sarcastic or thanking my close friends. But wish I didn't. The word has so much meaning that I really really wish it wasn't used so often in our everyday lives unless we really mean what we're saying. To me, love is the overpowering feeling that gives us the drive to do things, or provides us with unending happiness. Love is when you feel as though you don't want to live without something because it means so much to you. Love is desired by many and possessed by few. Lots of people want love because they believe it to be so amazing and great and give purpose to things. The thing people don't realize, and what I never really thought about, is how the things rather than the people we love impact us. Sure, I love my family and they're my everything, but that's a different type of love than what I have for sports. I freaking love sports. Give me a ball and I can promise you that I'll be playing catch with the closest person to me. I say I love sports because it's something that gives me a sense of comfort and allows me to release the emotions I bottle up throughout the day. Playing softball or field hockey makes me so happy I can barely find the words to describe it. If you ever watch me play, know that I literally smile like an idiot before the pitcher pitches the ball or after scoring a goal. Yep, like a freaking idiot. I'm the same way when I see a puppy or any animal for that matter. I practically grew up on farm, so anytime I see an animal it immediately makes me happy to see them. Of course the love I have for people I form relationships with is different from this as well. I've never told anyone I've dated, "I love you" because to me it's too powerful to say without meaning everything that comes with it. When I say it to someone I want them to know that they make me feel this different emotion that I don't feel towards anyone else, and that I hope they stay in my life as long as possible because they've become such an important part. I don't love anyone like that where I'm at now. I hope to find that kind of love but I for sure don't have it now. I'm definitely thinking way deeper into this than I intended, but I don't think I'll toss around the word "love" as much in the future. But while we're at it, the last thing that I love is admiring a starry night. I could sit outside for hours staring up at the sky and watching the twinkling stars sit above us. I just get so lost in them and think about anything whirling around in my brain without becoming stressed. If anything, I become relaxed. The sky is so beautiful and I like to take time to appreciate the little things it offers. There's probably a few other little things that I love, but the things that mean te most to me have already been explained.
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ReplyDeleteI completely agree that the word love gets thrown around way too much. Personally, I'm really guilty of it. I say I love things and people all the time. For example, I love snow, candy, ice cream, people, animals, etc... I do love all these these things, but it's a different kind of love. I believe that the definition of love is something or someone that brings you happiness and joy. So technically, I do love all those things, just in different ways. I love both ice cream and my friends, but not nearly in the same way. I enjoy eating ice cream and I like its taste, but I don't love it nearly as much as friends, family or pets. Those things are the more important things to me. They are what I really love. The material things are far less important in my opinion. It's kind of hard to explain since we use the same word, but I believe I have the reason. We love things that we can have an emotional connection to rather than something we like. This type of love is the more important kind to me. I believe someone should make a whole new word for the second love. I really could care less what it is, but we should have something to differentiate. Bye love u.
ReplyDeleteThere are a whole bunch of definitions for love which all are simply jammed into one word, and it is expected in the English language that we use that word for so many things, that “love” has lost its meaning. However, despite the simplicity and complexity of just ONE word, I will define in the best way I personally can. What love is to me is the strongest emotion that we have at our disposal, and one of the few emotions that we would move heaven and hell for. The feelings of knowing that you have something to come home to, something which you would want to live for, someone in which you would seemingly sacrifice everything for, those are some of the core values of love. Dramatic, I know, but I tend to be when talking about topics like this. Characteristics which define love vary from definition to definition of love, therefore I am only writing about love towards another, as that is by far the strongest. Some characteristics are as follows. If you ever realized that your life would seemingly be much more negative without that person in it, the person makes you happier about the woes of life, if you worry for their well-being whenever they make a risky decision, if you can truly call them a friend with all of your heart. Alright, that’s enough characteristics for now, onto the hard-hitting stuff. “What do I love?” is one of those questions which usually make me ponder if there is any material things that I love, before I answer if there is any people which I love. And there are material things which I love, and two of them. One, is books, for the stories that each author offers and the myriad of possibilities and scenarios and settings and emotions, and oh my god, I love books. The second thing is my phone, which sounds incredibly shallow, I know, but hear me out first. I don’t love my phone because of its entertainment value, I love it because it allows me to talk with the people that I do love, and for, it’s necessary and I love it solely for that reason. Now onto the people that I love. I love my mother and my father, for they had raised me and shaped me into the guy that I am today and I am ever so thankful for them. I love my close friends, for they have stuck with me for a while and somehow aren’t sick of me. And last, I love the one who is always here when I write these posts, and sometimes even answers them herself, my girlfriend, Angel (who has a last name of Love, which is one more definition that love can be attributed to, a last name). All of the things in which I previously said I loved do fall in the category of love which I wrote about, material love is different and I only provided an insight on that.
ReplyDeleteI think love is something so strong the word itself seems to do it no justice. For me things like trust and healing fall into the category of love. I don’t think I grew up with the best example of love but I think that itself is a blessing in disguise. The love I have for my mother is like no other, although it may seem like we have the toughest relationship because we are both geminis and so hard headed, my love for her is like no one else. Anyone who looked at our relationship and really picked out every little flaw would ask themselves do they really love each other? And that’s something I wouldn’t change for anything because it’s something that only my mother and I have obtained and grew in the years I’ve been alive. Although she’s not the best at showing it I know somewhere deep deep deep deep DEEEEPPP down she got a little lovin for me. My sister on the other hand is someone I can say I love you to and have tears in my eyes the minute because I absolutely 100% love and respect her and her flaws. Sometimes I forget that the people I love even make mistakes because I’m so mesmerized by them that I don’t believe their flaws exist. Love is something so intimate that only you and the thing you love could understand, not anyone else.
ReplyDeleteI consider love to be something or someone that brings you extreme happiness and that you deeply care about. I agree that the word love is thrown around carelessly now these days, even though people don’t always mean it. The word love is often used to describe things people enjoy. I am also guilty of doing this often in my daily life. The “love” I feel for my favorite foods and tv shows isn’t always real love per say, I just can’t think of another word to describe it. However, I would never say I love a person without fully meaning it. I don’t throw the word love around when talking about people. I only use the word love when talking about my friends, family, and pets. I consider the love I feel for them real and wouldn’t say it to someone without meaning it.
ReplyDeleteIn the past couple of years I have been very careful in the use of the word love. I have heard people say it a lot and it makes me angry because at this point it has no value. So this is causing some problems now since I have no idea what love is and what I really love. From what I understand there are different types of love. There is when sibling love each other , when you love your parents, when friends love your friends, and relationship love. I have only experienced 3 out of these 4 .I know I love my family including the ones in Egypt no matter what they do. I love my friends who are constantly putting up with my annoying ass. But I have no idea how it is like when you actually love someone. I thought if you are in a relationship you would love your partner no matter what, but then there are breakups and then people hate each other which confuses me because if you really love someone how could you all of a sudden hate them this much. From what I have experienced when you love someone you stand by them no matter what, and they would do the same. If you really love someone you would be loyal and honest to them and when they need you it is your obligation to be there for them. For what I love, Love my religion, family and friends. But sometimes I do love feeling successful and that fact that I have accomplished something. That all I know for now.
ReplyDeleteTrying to define love when I have personally never one hundred percent felt it towards anything or anyone tangible is difficult. The best way I can describe it is that it is a strong, passionate feeling of affection. This will probably sound cliché but I think something I love a lot is music. I say this in the most genuine way possible, but I really believe music saved my life, or at least made it a whole lot better. Music has given me so many things, it gave me something to look forward to and it gave me feeling when I have felt numb. There are so many songs that have made me feel comfort when I have felt alone and I think that's why I truly love music because it can make you feel better when nothing else can. For me, music is truly encouraging, soothing, and comforting- and I believe those are also the characteristics of love.
ReplyDeleteLove, put simply, is mostly just the overwhelming feeling of joy or happiness towards something. But when we say we love something, whether it be a food, and object, or a living thing, the love we feel towards them is always slightly different. I don't think that the love for a food shouldn't be considered love, its just a different type of love than compared to love for a person. I do think that there should be more words for love that can be used in regards to the topic or situation. They could all be synonyms for love, but just represent the type of love being referenced. A love for a friend would have a different word than a love for your favorite candy, and then there would be a different word to describe the love of a piece of art, and a pet, a family member, a partner, a clothing item, and so on. There are many things I love, but assuming that the question is asking what brings me unconditional happiness and love, I can narrow that list down to a few things. If anyone has ever had a conversation with me, you'll already know that I love my dog because she is essentially my child. She can bring constant joy and havoc at the same time all while being cute and cuddly when I need her most. Other living things that I love obviously include my family and my close friends, and even for the people who have left me in the past, but they are all different types of love. Until we find other ways to express different types of love, we should all be cautious of when and how we use the word love, as its genuine effect could be tainted by the insignificant things in life.
ReplyDeleteTo begin with, I completely agree with the quote: no matter the extent of our pleasure, we almost always claim to “love” that source of pleasure. Though I am definitely guilty of doing the same myself, I’m starting to become more aware of my usage of the word “love” after realizing its strength. Love is difficult to describe in words, but it is a feeling that, ultimately, gives us happiness, no matter how many fights, because the joy we feel with what or who we love helps us to overcome the obstacles that we face. For one, I love my family, especially my mom; the amount of sacrifices that she has made for my family and me gives me the utmost respect and love for her, and I understand that she makes those sacrifices because she loves us. When I contemplate the more miniscule things that I claimed to have loved, such as Oreos or playing well in a tennis match, I realized that love is a much stronger word than we believe it to be, so it has changed my perspective to make me understand that I would only use this word for something that I have a deep affection for.
ReplyDeleteWell shit, another blog post that requires me to delve deep into my subconscious. Great. To start off, I would say that love is undefinable. It is such a strong entity on its own, that it is hard to put into words. To the best of my abilities, I would define love as a strong emotional connection that is beyond a simple desire or “like”. Love, like many things in life, is complex and does not pertain to one set of beliefs or actions. There are many ways to express love, but the most common way is through the use of the phrase “I love you!” Going back to the initial idea of the blog, I do believe that the word “love” is thrown around too often. It is something that must be treated with importance and respect, since it carries such deep sentiments. If you hold something, or someone, to the highest standards, value them at the same level that you value yourself, and are willing to put your reputation on the line for their sake, you are truly in love. It seems quite extreme, but it’s the truth. I, personally, don’t love many things. I love having a cohesive family, a close connection with God, a deep understanding of my cultural background, an unbreakable bond with music, and all jokes aside, FOOD. Good food can have such an impact on a person’s life, as it often times carries a deeper, cultural message within the savory (or sweet) mouthfuls. Now that I reflect on it, I realize that things that I once “loved” aren’t of the utmost standards that I have described. I have to hold myself accountable for the things that I say, and I have to be more aware of the context in which I spit words out. ~Dibsy~
ReplyDeleteWell dayuum this blog got me a lil but das okay I got it.
ReplyDeleteSo after I finished reading this blog I started laughing. I started laughing at all of us specially after reading other people's blog responses (I totally respect their opinions no matter what, I don't mean to disrespect at all). When we're asked what is love or what does the word love mean to us I bet 95% of us will give the same answer. We use the word love on a daily base as if it was a normal word and when we're asked what does the word love mean to us, we're like "OH love means A LOT love is a VERY BIG word" Not gonna lie, I use the word love a lot but the difference is that I NEVER say the word love when I don't mean it. When I use the word love or when I tell u that I love u you have to believe me because that's what I really feel. Despite the fact that I use it many times but at least I mean it every time I say it.
When I think of the word love my brain gets crowded. My brain gets confused because I believe that love doesn't have one definition, there's MANY and don't ask me to narrow them down cause that would take HOURS...BUT...I will tell you about the feeling I get when I think of the word love. Safe. I feel safe, warm, happy, and pain all at the same exact time It's like a tasty-disgusting cocktail drink man...damn it. By me saying this don think that I fell in love before cause no I DID NOT and MIGHT NOT (IK, I'll discuss this laterrr) my relationship w/ love is just unknown even to me, like there's a big a** question mark between me and love so idk what are the characteristics of love, like I don't think that I'll know it when I find my true love so yeah (i don care to be honest). But I do love things. I love my family, I love school(sike), I love my friends, I love having fun, I love making others happy, I love-and no I need to stop because this is so basic and that's what anyone will say. But seriously, I love the way I love, I love how I value people, I love honest people, I love loyal people, I love happy people, I love true people, I love the people that know how to love and give it all they got, and most importantly...I love it when people say I love you even if they say it every day, as long as they mean it when they say I love you. I love you!
Love can have different meanings. Love is also a strong word. Love is something you are willing to sacrifice for no matter what. It is the determination that drives you to love what you love to do. I believe love is just a feeling of happiness you find in something that you can't find anywhere else. People do the things they love because its what makes them happy. Love can be defined in different ways depending on how you would use it. If I would say I love sleeping compared to saying I love a particular person, love will have different meaning for both but both give me happiness so happiness is the characteristics that ties in with love. I also think trust falls in the word "love". In most relationships today, trust is very important. We love the people we love because we trust them but doing something stupid can jeopardize our trust against most people. Yes we may not want to have that idea but if someone does something to you once, you will questions everything else others do to you. I love many things that I have in my life. I love my family and friends. I also love music and playing sports. I love all these things because they all share something in common and that is they make me very happy.
ReplyDeleteLove has many definitions and connotations that can all mostly make you feel like you understand love. Make us feel like we understand love. We do things we love, watch movies we love, marry people we love, take care of people we love, take care of things we love. And I would expect that these people and things are all very valuable and special to us, hence the reason we love them. The reason we do for them and take care of them. I’d like to say that I really love, love. I can say that in the most wholeheartedly way, I love love. I love what happens when love included, I love it when you can feel genuine love. I think it is just a piscean thing though lmao. I believe showing your love for someone can be through asking them about their day. It can be shown by asking them if they showered, or if they ate, or why they feel so down one day. It can be shown by telling them to fasten their seatbelt. It isn’t hard to show someone you love them. I just think that for them to feel it, it has to be consistent and genuine. It has to be something you truly love doing. You have to truly love and care for them. Love is a word that has to be said when it’s truly genuine. Love is just a word and I think to really place an emphasis on the things you love you have to be able to talk about why you love them and get happy when you do. I can talk about how much I love my bed and really, sincerely mean everything I say about it with a big ole smile on my face. Some people interpret love in their own way and sometimes they do have beautiful meanings and sometimes they aren't.
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