Ahhh...the unwitting brilliance of Eminem. Waaaay before he was murdering MGK he was gifting us with some genuine pearls of wisdom...and I don't say that sarcastically. When you think about it, other's perceptions of us often turn out to be true--even when we don't want them to be. We can explore this idea later, and we will, but for now, just this.
How many times have you said to yourself, and for that matter, to anyone who would listen--"I don't care what anyone else thinks...".
I know I've said it at least once in the past month--please note, today is the first day of the month...so...yeah, already said it.
In our heart of hearts, though, do we really believe that?
It seems an age-old question, but it is one that may not have just one answer: to what extent do other people's perceptions of you have an impact on the decisions you make?
Peer pressure, parental pressure, self-imposed pressure, all these outside, or inside, forces have the potential to make you act, or react, in ways that you normally might not if never exposed to those influences.
My question is: Why? Why do we care?
Why is it important?
Why do other people's perceptions or expectations of who we are have so much of an influence on us? Or do they? Be honest with yourself when you answer. After all, it's just us so you can be honest here.
I am guilty of saying "I don't care what anyone else thinks." I mainly do this not because I don't care about some people's opinions but because I don't care about what they have to say about me. Not everyone cares but when we do it's because we want to know "the tea" or feel that it's of our importance. It's important because sometimes I need to be aware of what others think to realize something about myself or to just be respectful. It gets too far to listen when it starts to damage my confidence so I comprehend and then brush it off. Negative thoughts are toxic to my happiness. The perceptions of others make me who I am. If word gets out that I'm funny or a great friend then that promotes a self image and a higher self esteem to maintain happiness. I think the views of others around us help us notice the things we don't realize when we look at ourselves in the mirror.
ReplyDeleteI tell myself that I don’t care what anyone else thinks a lot. Sometimes I truly don’t care, but other times, what other people think can stay in the back of my mind. It doesn’t really limit what I do or impact the decisions I make, however, that doesn’t mean I don’t care. People, in general, look towards others to see if what they are doing is socially acceptable. We like knowing that our actions brought someone else comfort or joy. Therefore, we care because we can use people’s perceptions as a type of “mold” that we should follow in order to deliver those expectations. Even if you might think that you are super resilient against perceptions and influences of other people, you still might act a different way around people who you know, care about, or even complete strangers. I believe that other people’s perception has a great influence on us because we all want to be part of the group, no matter what group that is, and it can help us realize something new about our character.
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ReplyDeleteI pretty much narrowed down the answer to the best of my ability. Emotions. We all have feelings and emotions. We aren’t heartless, insensitive robots. In the past I used to say “ whatever I don’t care “ when I would get really mad but I took accountability for it and I don’t say that anymore because I know it’s just a lie. I think it’s important to show that we care because in a relationship, a person who isn’t expressing their emotions verbally or physically will make the other person lead to assumptions and make misconceptions.
DeleteI think people care the most of what others think in high school. I see people act completely different for attention. Society has taught us that we need to follow another persons footsteps to be accepted. People don’t understand that it is okay to like different things, it is okay to express yourself differently. I know that with 7 billion people in the world, they aren’t alone. I used to care so much about what others thought of me but my mom started to tell me “ would that matter in a week, a month, a year?” And the answer was always no. Since I was little I always loved dressing differently than other people, I still love it. But many times I have gotten insecure and hurt about something someone has said to me or about me. There is nothing wrong with feeling this way. It’s simply how humans are.
As a principle I try not to care when people think negatively of me. Caring about all the negative ways people think of you is going do nothing but drag you down. It is because of this belief that 95% of the time I truly do not care what other people think of me. But that last 5% is saved for people that are important to me. Now don't get me wrong I believe all life is important but I am talking the few people who I would walk to the ends of the earth for. Their opinion matters to me. This select group consists mainly of family because to me family comes before all but there are a few outsiders who have managed to sneak their way in. People like my girlfriend and close friends accompanied by a few other stragglers all have opinions that have sway over my decisions. But why does this matter to humans as a species? I believe that opinions matter because Humans are social creatures therefore they try to fit into other human standards and opinions so they may feel like they belong in that specific group. Written in a less science nerd sort of way, peoples opinions are important to us because we want friends.
ReplyDeleteThere are many people in this world that say they don’t care. 99.9% of those people don’t mean it. We live in a world where society and their opinions are everything to us. We are all brought to certain standards and that is a lot of pressure. There are times when we say we don’t care because we want to not care but we simply can’t. It’s just the price of being a human. Our brains can’t really just not care. It’s so much more complicated than that. When you fit under a certain category of things in the world you feel assured. We just love the feeling of acceptance. If the new trend of the world is hot pink sneakers and you have those hot pink sneakers than you feel great because you feel like you’re a part of something, but if you don’t have those hot pink sneakers you’re in for a rude awakening. You’re automatically dubbed as poor or not fashion forward which is most of the time far from the truth, but it doesn’t matter.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to what people think about me I feel like I used to care a lot more than I do now, I used to listen to what everyone said about me and would immediately try and change it if it seemed at all negative. But then I realized that I shouldn’t let the decisions of others change my mind so quickly, just because they think something good or bad doesn’t mean that I have to agree. Recently I have been listening to myself more and have sort of had that “I don’t care” response myself, and not letting other people's opinions sway my decisions as much, except for of course people that are very close to me such as my parents and certain friends. There are always times though where someone's opinion is definitely good and should be listened too, but you should just be able to know when that is. I think that why most people care is because everyone wants everyone else to like them, and we think that if we do what they say it will make this happen. When people give their opinion of you it's something that makes you think and something that if you think about for awhile you might believe it to be true even if it's not. So to kinda sum it up I think that we need to just know when to listen to people and when to ignore them based off our own common sense.
ReplyDeletePeople say that "I don't care what anyone thinks", to show a sign of strength in their moral character. That opinions and perceptions about them do not define them in any way shape or form. To nearly every person in the world, that is a complete and utter lie. We care because it's human nature to do so. To desire to impress others, to feel accepted by our peers and society, to have positive comments thrown our way because they make us feel good, THAT'S why we care. And it's important that we care about the way we look, the way we act, the way we are defined because without it, what guidelines would a society have? There would not be any, the society would be thrown into complete chaos, and the human desire of acceptance would never be satiated. People's opinions and perceptions on us are very important because of, again, acceptance. Being dubbed as fashionable, trendy, whichever adjective that we use to describe socially acceptable today is something that many of us want, and many of us want to be defined as. I can most certainly say that people's opinions define, or at least push me to be what I am thought to be.
ReplyDeleteI believe that when I say I don’t care what people think about me, I mean it. If I did care, I would more insecure about things and my personality would be different. But, people’s perception do have an impact on my life because we are influenced by people every day. Not just by our friends, but our family too. The way we talk, dress, and act is because of the people that we surround ourselves with. When people care about people’s opinions, it’s because they want to fit in and feel included. This is important because in order to have friends, you need to be like or have the same characteristics as someone else. But, some people want more then one friend, so they try to become “popular” by trying to talk to/ become like different people. Similarly, people care about other people’s thoughts because they don’t want to be made fun of because of the way they’re acting. I have come to a point where, if people don’t like how I look or act then they don’t have to talk to me. I’m living my life the way I want to and I’m not going to change to make someone like me.
ReplyDeleteI’ve learned over the years that someone who claims “I don’t care what people think” is someone who cares the most. I believe people put up such a front just to impress people that won’t even be apart of their life. If you’re an outcast you’re inevitably perceived as weird. Which truly sucks and gives the word unique, no purpose at all. No one is not longer themselves, it’s literally monkey see monkey do. When someone tells you they don’t like something you or the way you act you WILL think about it, you might not take it to heart but it will be in the back of your mind. You’ll slowly find yourself changing who you are to fit the needs of one person. I’m pretty happy with who I am right now as a person and I don’t want to lose who am I simply because society tells me to.
ReplyDeleteIn all honesty, I've probably used the phrase "I don't care what anyone else thinks" way more times than I can count. I might not have said it out loud every time but I definitely thought it multiple times. In my experience, I've found that I'm most likely to use this when I'm in a stressful spot, wanting to just be confident with who I am enough to not wonder if someone is silently judging me. I overthink things and get in my own head thinking and wondering why I do some things the way I do, or why I can never work hard enough to be where I want to be. We care because of our insecurities and what we wish was different about us. But for some, it's so important that we "don't care about others opinions" because it's a popular phrase used by those who could be seen as higher up in the popularity chain we have here at school. Socially, almost all of us want to fit in and be seen as someone who is happy with who we are, and as someone who never thinks twice about the little things. However, we always hold back from doing so because we aren't comfortable with everyone. Think about it, nobody acts the exact same way in front of everyone. This is ultimately because we're scared to be judged or seen as "different" from other's personalities when we're not around someone we're close with. It's not always a bad thing because everyone carries a different vibe, but on the flip side it's not the best because you're hiding who you are. Personally I tend to become shy or quiet around different people because I'm not the most confident person and I sometimes fear the hurtful whispers people do behind your back when they think you're not paying attention. Slowly, I'll learn to just deal with it and be who I am 24/7 around anyone, without worrying what their opinions are. We all need to stop listening to what society says is the "right" thing to do, and be more like the people we really are.
ReplyDeleteI often say the phrase “I don’t care what anyone else thinks.” To me this phrase is true to a certain extent. I don’t care what most people think or say about me. The only things that matter to me are the things that my few close friends and family members think. I can’t help, but to care what they think and to try to seek their approval. Their opinion of me matters greatly because I care and love them so much so of course I would be hurt if they were judging or talking about me. People often care what others think because they want to be liked and have to fit in with others. This is important because it makes people act differently in order to seek the majorities approval or fit into certain groups. Other peoples perceptions and expectations of me have some influence on me and put me under stress because I don’t want to disappoint anyone. However, it also pushes me to do and be a better person, so I’m grateful. Some people don’t like conflict, so when someone has a conflicting opinion with them, they back down and their voice is lost. It’s hard to stand up against a large group of people and the pressure often causes people to switch their opinion or perception on things.
ReplyDeleteThe people who claim they don't care about others opinions are the ones who care the most. They are the people who are constantly trying to convince themselves that others options of them don't matter. I am for sure one of those people. Even if you don’t want to admit it we all self consciously worry about others opinions. For the most part I dont care about what others think, but we all have those days when we’re feeling insecure. People need positive feedback from others to feel good about themselves. Once in awhile i'll wear something and wonder the whole day what people are thinking, or i'll post something on social media and wonder what people thought. My biggest worry and insecurity is for sure my anxiety. I’m constantly worrying if people are noticing my ticks and fidgets. School is usually when i'm the most anxious, mainly because of all the people and noises and stress. I get so overwhelmed that i'll leave the room or just step into the hall to calm down, while i'm out there I usually get more worked up because I start worrying if people noticed and if they did what they're thinking about me. I mean i’m the girl who got so anxious at prom last year that I had an anxiety attack and had to leave. I left my crummy ex boyfriend at prom and ran out the door crying and hyperventilating. And when I tell you that's the most embarrassed i've ever been i really mean that it was the most embarrassed i've ever been! Coming to school that monday was the ABSOLUTE WORST!!! I was so concerned about who knew and just overall really embarrassed, I didn't know who knew or who saw. In those situations it shouldn't even bother me what other people think because anxiety is so unpredictable and out of my control. But especially now that i’m older it’s my biggest worry.
ReplyDeleteSince the dawn of time, humans have depended strongly on one another for basic survival. This sense of dependency is a major aspect of human nature, and even though tribal life doesn’t seem to have a shred of relevance in this sense, it is what has instilled in us the importance of other people’s perceptions and opinions. Personally, other’s perceptions of me have a tremendous impact on my day to day life, in regards to even the most trivial of topics such as my personal appearance. We care so strongly about what other people have to say because we want to fit in and change ourselves to blend in to societal expectations, even if someone firmly states that they are “a leader, not a follower”. We often mistake wanting to impress others with seeking approval from other people. This is where the conflict comes in, since we are essentially placing our own well being and virtues in the hands of complete strangers. It would be completely hypocritical of me to deny that, I too, value the opinions of the people around me with importance. I can hardly step into Walmart without feeling “presentable” to other people, even though it is a known fact that these same “people of Walmart” are from an entirely different planet. Maybe it’s just the way that I was raised, but painting myself as an obedient, clean, and put-together kid has always held a significance to me and my family. Listening to other people’s opinions isn’t always bad, since we are able to better ourselves through the input of our family and friends, as long as we train ourselves to distinguish the difference between beneficial and toxic advice. That’s all for today folks. Dibsy-Doodle out. *mic drop*
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ReplyDeleteI try my best to ignore other people's opinions of me, but like many others I don't always. I think I've gotten a lot better over the years, but I still let people's opinions effect me sometimes. Even if I say it isn't important, in my mind I believe it is a little bit. I won't completely change who I am, but I might act slightly differently around different people. As humans, it is pretty natural to want other people to like you and think your cool. I know most people have definitely done or said things that I probably wouldn't have just because others were doing it. We do these things because we like the other people or look up to them in some way and want their approval. An additional reason we change our character sometimes is when other people perceive us that way. It gets into our heads that their perception is right. I need to work on caring less about that stuff and just being myself. Although, we should still consider others' opinions and make our own decisions to better ourselves.
ReplyDeleteI do say that I do not care what people think, but I actually do. Why do I care, I do not know. But I think it is the way I grew up. I grew up listening to what people say about me, and if they ( specifically my whole Egyptian family) do not like my personality I HAVE to change. I especially saw that in the summer of my freshman year when I went back to Egypt. They did not like the fact that I was playing with my cousins because I am a girl. They did not like the way I talked. They also did not like my body. And I had no other choice but to listen to them, and that is the way I grew up. So, I have to be what people think of me, and if they do not think so funddly of me I have to change that. I also do not know why their feedback is important. My mom told me I have to listen to them because they are my family and they want want the best for me. I think II use what they say to change. I think what people say habe influence on me because when they say it I think to myself that is who I am. I try not to let people’s comments get to me, but they actually do.
ReplyDeleteI understand that sometimes people’s opinions of you can truly be destructive to your self confidence and your love for yourself. Sometimes those opinions are thought about ever so deeply and can cause for extreme contemplation of oneself. When you worry too much about how you look in someone else’s mind or what kind of person you are from someone else’s point of view it takes away from who you are. I don’t care about what anybody has to say about me because I’ve fallen too deeply in love with myself to do so. I’ve reached a new level of self love and self confidence to let what anyone says about me change that. If there is something wrong with my character or my clothes or my hair, my opinion is the only opinion strong enough to change it. Everyone is going to talk about you. Whether you’re a millionaire or a cashier at Walmart. Everyone will talk about your car, whether it’s a 1996 Honda or a 2018 BMW. You will be talked about in a positive and in a negative way throughout your whole life. Caring about what the next person says about you will be the least of your concerns. No matter what, I am me and I will remain me! (Btw, I don’t know if this is gonna post with my name so just incase, It’s Dajiyah!)
ReplyDeleteI've always known that I cared about what other people think; I don't try to fool myself into thinking otherwise. We care what other people think because each of us is one person in a world that contains more than 7 billion people. Internally, we are alone versus everyone else, so we care about what those people think of us. It's important because that's how we gauge our life. We're happy if people have a good impression of us. If not, then we change it. This approval is important to us because we want to feel accepted into the grand scheme of the world. I would say it's impossible to think you don't care what other people think. You learn at a young age what pleases you parents and what doesn't and this was the first step of developing this mind set. It's not a bad thing. It's natural.
ReplyDeleteI definitely care about what other people think, there’s so many things that I would do if I didn’t. We’re surrounded by people, and we care deeply about they think of us, so they won’t leave. Everyone wants to be accepted and fit in, and feel loved. I know it’s a constant battle for people, and myself included to conform to societal standards. I would dress so much differently, and present myself so much differently if I didn’t care about what people thought. I’m constantly worried about people judging me. I feel like I’ve never been comfortable enough to express my true self. I think people’s perceptions really matter to me because I’m just insecure and feel the constant need to be validated. I have a fear of being abandoned and rejected. I fear people talking about me and judging me. I don’t think I have a strong sense of self so I rely on how others react to me to figure out who I am.
ReplyDeleteMost people say the phrase "I don't care what anyone else thinks" to show their strength and that nothing bothers them. Its superiority. I know this because I do it myself. In reality, I do care what everyone tells me. Why? I can tell you that I'm the type of person that often take things to heart. I listen to what someone has to say about me all the time and sometimes it will affect me mentally in a good/bad way. It's impossible for someone to not care about what is being said to them. Most of the time I tell myself that everything they just said isn't important but it really is because why were you listening in the first place? Its important because people care about themselves. I care about myself. I care about how I look, how I am as a person, how I act, etc. Who doesn't? People's expectations of who we are has so much influence on us because we want people to like us and we want to please those people. We interact differently towards different people because everyone is different. Not everyone will like the same stuff you do.
ReplyDeleteWhy do we care? I had to think deeply about this question before answering it, probably it's either because I don't know the answer or because I've never asked myself this question before. We should not care, we shouldn't care about what others think of us, we should not care about what others say about us behind our back, and we shouldn't care about the people that judge us. We are humans, humans make mistakes, and the more mistakes we make (even if we didn't do them on purpose) the more people that will judge us. The people that judge us are not perfect either, they make mistakes too and that's why they prefer to talk about your mistakes instead of talking about their own because they know that they will be judged. We should not waste our time worrying about what others said or will say, instead, we should spend more time developing ourselves and making ourselves better. Here's the thing, people, they will keep talking, always and it will never end and you don't want them to stop talking about you because the more they talk about you the more you know that you got their attention, and they're either jealous of you or want to be like you.
ReplyDeleteI often say I don’t care what others think about me when in reality, I really do. I personally care because when people who you don’t talk to see you, they base their feelings about you mainly on what you look like so I try to look my best in order to have a good reputation. I also try and act my best in order to have a good reputation. I mainly care about what coaches think about me in soccer. If a coach thinks little of me, I won’t get recruited/get minutes. If I didn’t care about what coaches thought of me then I wouldn’t get very far in my soccer career. If I didn’t care about what my parents or colleges thought about my grades then I wouldn’t try in school. The thought of caring about what people think about you can be good and bad. If you care about what people think about how you do your job or your grades, etc. then the thought of what people think about you can serve as an internal drive to be good at that thing. But if you care about what people think of you based off your clothes and things like that then it can really bring down your confidence.
ReplyDeleteI have told myself a countless number of times that I don’t care what anyone else thinks; no matter the amount of times I told myself this, people’s thoughts about me had frequently lingered in my mind. This is similar to most people, as we do not want to appear vulnerable because we believe that vulnerability is a sign of weakness, and trying to seem strong is simply human nature. If I do, or ever did, change due to someone’s thoughts about me, I make sure that it is an improvement and not something that entirely changes who I am. We care about other people’s opinions because we always search for guidance and different ways to better ourselves, making it easier for us to believe that what someone else has to say can be beneficial, especially if that person is close to us. Other people’s perceptions of us have an enormous influence because we may agree with their perception, which causes us to live up to that expectation in order to avoid letting them down.
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